Labels 'R Us

"fuck labels! They are bullshit, a sort of security blanket for the weak minded"

Jul 6, 2008

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The world is all about labels. Wearing the right label and you are deemed fashionable or held in such a high regard people want to know you. They will assume that you are somebody based solely on that label factor. Labels are everywhere, you can't escape them. It's on the food you consume, the cologne you wear, even the brand of TV that you watch. It's insane! You could seriously bypass a good product just because of the label. If not sporting the right label you're not in the "in crowd", not allowed certain respects or even feelings. To that I say fuck labels! They are bullshit, a sort of security blanket for the weak minded. I have been officially done with labels when I read a book by Osho where he confirmed the sentiments I've had for years. I thought I was crazy until I read where he stated they were unimportant when pertaining to relationships because, for example, married people take advantage of each other everyday, breaking the commandments of marriage and to some when pertaining to an intimate sexual, highly personable relationship, marriage is at the top of that list.

Whether married or not couples whether new or old, do the same thing with each other. They love, they war, they breakup to make-up, say things that they shouldn't say in the midst of anger and so on and so forth. That's the nature of the relationship. The funny thing is some of these "relationships" go from great to terrible soon as a label is attached, you ever notice that? You and your new found love interest can be living the high life, things are going great. You're having sex every other day if not everyday. Sweet things are being said and done. The sky is always blue and sunny when they are around. And this can be going on for months, and then one day you decide to do the most terrible of things and attach a label to what you have and then you know what? It's all downhill from there.

In the song home now Gwen Stefanie sings on the No Doubt album the return of saturn about a distant lover or used to be lover that she wants to, "take him for granted and see him regular". And isn't that what the relationship labels are all about! Being together, treating each other like shit and calling it a loving relationship. A relationship where if the person does something that you find offensive you have the right to beef about it. Because without that label you are not a real person with feelings and you will otherwise go ignored or worst yet deemed crazy enough to need to seek help from a shrink.

So let me ask you when getting involved with someone what's important? I mean if you were to get married to someone what would be important to you? Their good looks? How they are in bed? How much money they have? How much of their representing self they present to you? I mean what is? I think the number one factor whey people fail in relationships is because no-one wants to admit that they are incompatible. People are so stuck on those fucking labels that they would actually stay in a relationship with someone just because...

What am I rambling about really? Without getting into full details because I know there is someone in particular watching every word that I type on this here screen and he doesn't need to be that far up in my business. I was recently told by a thing I used to think was a caring human being that because I was not his girl I had no right to feel a certain way about something that he did that I thought was just, classless. For it and I am proud of this moment now more than ever, in the club on the night of his birthday I slapped the shit out of him. Now normally I don't condone any female laying her hands on a man because the right guy might beat the crap out of a woman. And honestly I was lucky that night. After turning around and slapping his face in front of the girl that he committed this classless act with I stormed out of the club so fast, in the event that he got over the shock that I actually did it and pulled my mohawk out.

I was hurt I must admit. I shared a moment with him that I hadn't shared with someone in a long time before then so I was a bit upset when I saw what I did in the corner of the club, the very reason that I told him I didn't want to come to club that night was staring me in the face and I felt like a fool for ignoring my instincts. As usual.

So according to him not only were we not dating but I was not his girl so I should go seek a shrink. I say to thee, suck a dick.

People put way too much emphasis on those labels, when pertaining to relationships anyway. It's like an excuse to do things that are just iniquitous, so to speak, to a person and not feel sorry about it later. What happened to genuine caring, manners and respect? What happened to the other person's feelings? Without a label is it truly ok for say, a man to have sex with one girl and then her sister and tell her she can't get upset because she's not his girl? Or is that an exception because of the sister factor?

How about if he has sex with this girl and makes her feel like she is the world to him but then she finds out he's been seeing someone else, a total stranger to her? Is she honestly beside herself if she cries, gets angry and tells him to fuck off or slaps him in the face no matter what her rational? Oh I know what you are thinking and to whatever thought you have I say, smacking organic on a genetically modified product doesn't make it organic, so whether you deem a woman your girlfriend or your fuck buddy doesn't mean she is not going to have feelings or rather that she is not to express those feelings. I mean I don't know about everyone else, but for me, I don't make reservations for my feelings for anyone. You piss me off and in one way or another you are going to know that you did. [ LOL, still laughing at my organic analogy].

I could be calm about it or I can blow a fuse or I can do nothing at all, the point is you are going to know. I don't subscribe to these ridiculous label rules. Like, why did you slap him you're not his girl? Like, I slapped him because he was a fucking asshole that deserved to get slapped. Would it be more understandable if I had done something similar to what he had done that night and he had slapped me or maybe he wouldn't have slapped me because it's not in a man's nature to react that way to that kind of situation. Maybe he just wouldn't have spoken to me again because he looked at me as a low class hoe who jumps from man to man. And that would have been an understandable reaction, right? But why? He isn't my man for all I'm concerned he shouldn't be angry, he should understand it was my birthday and I was just trying to get lucky and he just got caught in the cross fire of my attempt to get laid.

Labels are so funny in this way, even when it's on the gear someone sports. Sure a person can be rocking a $200 pair of Evisu's does that make them a more responsible, respectable trust worthy individual? So what your neighbors have been married for 10 years, does that mean his wife isn't cheating on him regular and he's not physically abusing her? What I'm really trying to ask is, does that label make them happy forever? Does it mean that they love each other? Does it mean he will never look at another woman again?

I mean seriously if there is a time to realize that labels are a fucking joke it has to be now. With the rise of divorces and a lack of respect for labels how can you not see my point? No one is taking the time anymore to know each other, their level of compatibility. Can you stand to be around this person for more than five minutes? Though to me it's more about the connection and the true love you have for that person goes far beyond any branding you can give someone and I don't care for them, I care more about us seeing eye to eye, though I realize that labels are very important when dealing with men.

Men need that. It truly is a security blanket for them. Whether they want to admit it or not. If I have to go through every relationship I've been in long term or short without that label men will not grant you certain rights. Women are different. We don't need labels to cook for you, tell you that we love you, have sex with you or even take care of you when you are sick. We just go with our feelings. But men, in the experiences that I've had and many of my girlfriends have had and many of the relationships my male friends have had other than when it comes to having sex, men need to put a label on a woman to feel that she can react a certain way in certain situations.

They don't feel they have to call for a month because "she isn't my girl anyway". They feel that she only gets a smidgen of respect because there is no label there. Forget that she is a person who bleeds and feels. And rejection let me tell you, has lasting effects that can be equivalent to actual physical pain and sometimes worse.

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